WOPR's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Freds Adventure]

Ahh yes I remember these flash games of old...

[Adpocalypse (Prototype)]

I like sitch and appreciate the effort, but gotta say that this is terribly unoptimized, keep up the work, keep the patches coming, and here's hoping it'll become a shining example of good game designing soon. :)

(Though, I can't land all the issues with you, new Gamemaker has these kinds of issues, they just don't make them like Iji anymore)

SheeplessDreamr responds:

unoptimized in terms of what exactly? coding? yeah the coding isnt effecient tbh. Im actually very new to game dev, this is literally my first project ever. I got kinda carried away and might be too ambitious for me

[H x Alien]

a quarter of the screen is cut off on each end, talking to the model in the room freezes the character in place.

hentai-agent responds:

Just realized I set the resolution wayyy too small. Should be okay now.

[Slap The Trump]

Completely randomized, can do nothing for a long time, then just dump everything on you at once, making enemies completely unavoidable. (also the ad took longer to load than the game, seriously?)

But hey, I'm willing to bet this game was made by CTR, so I kind of expected crap quality from a crap candidates crap fan. ;P

[Monster Book]

Ahh yes, these drawings remind me of me... When I was 12. I'm a crap artist.

Very good to remenice, yes?

...Wish my drawings survived the various moves. Still though, thank you for sharing this with us matt. And keep up the good work!

matt-likes-swords responds:

Thanks!

[Album Cover Parodies]

Not badly made, the SFX got a little grating at times, but the important part is "how were the parodies" and they were good.

Sure I got a crappy score, despite knowing what a 45" is. But I never much liked music as a standalone art form. Preferred it as a supporting art. Something used to make something else better, not to sit and listen to for an hour straight after buying a $10-$12 CD. But that's just me. xP

Still well made. :)

[Newgrounds' Illuminatimas]

Well done art, funny "where's waldo" styled play. All in all a good use of 10-15 minutes while I downloaded a game off Steam sale. Only real complaint is the music gets grating after the first few loops because it's such a short loop. Would be nice if there were more than one song I guess. Thankfully there was a mute button so I could start listening to Spanish Flea and the Jeopardy theme while looking for that last other reference.
The only hint I'll give: If you don't know what the "other references" are, check the sticky notes around the cards.

...If you're REALLY desperate... Umm, [SPOILER_ALERT]owls/butterflies/checkerboards[/SPOILER_ALERT]

[Castle Guard]

Far too much like every other game of it's type.
Spear > Horse > Sword > Archer > Spear...
I don't know what else to really review here other than I've seen it a million times over and each time better done than this. Feels really overrated, doesn't seem to try to explain much, blatantly shows the hard-counters in the upgrade screen, just in general feels old and dated (and looks like it too, animations appear to be from 2005)

[Nuclear Plant 2]

Far too easy, completed it in 10-15 minutes, maxed out all the skills and still had 20+ points left over, bought all but one gun (the one assigned to key "6") it just felt short, repetitive, and all in all like a waste of time. Enemies never got "harder" they just got more health. Maybe if they fought back rather than running straight at me it would have been more fun.

2.5/5 due to lack of glitches and being functional; but still being really boring and short.

[Slender 2D]

"Ehh"
If this game has proven anything, it's that "who needs skill or originality when I can make a game based off a meme and get 'best of the month' for it."
That being said, to the list of problems.
The art is horrible for starters, you might as well not have the "player character" model in the center because its legs are some of the worst. The static isn't very good looking AT ALL and I don't think when that happens the foreground images should show through them.
The sprint mechanic is useless, with unlimited stamina there's no reason to NOT use it, like the predators cloaking in the new AvP it's a waste of a button and giving the player busywork (or pinky cramp) instead of strategy or a real use. When I saw slender, I'm sorry but I just started laughing, he looked so out of place with the rest of the art, like a horrible Photoshop monstrosity (not the scary kind, the "omg lol" kind.)
Lastly, it's not too frightening, like Slender itself it's 90% hype, the 10% remaining being suspense, it's not frightening or anything it's just "is it about to blow my ears out? is it? Is It?! IS IT?!?!" at which point to instantly "turn off the scary" just mute the darn game, it has about as much terror as listening to an MP3 track that suddenly in the middle of the song blasts static and a scream into your ear before laughing and going "haha, got you". There's no sense of terror, it's as though slender himself is that one dick friend that after inviting you over hides behind your door only to jump out and yell "BALOOGY-WOOGY-WOO!" when you least expect it.

I don't like tearing games a new one, but it's poorly made, poorly drawn, elements just feel out of place at times, and you shouldn't be able to break a sense of terror by disabling a sense. I want something where players almost jump back to cover their eyes but have to keep plowing through (instead of just their ears).

4/10 - No bugs or real breaking issues, just bland, unfun, unoriginal, and looks lazy.